Tag Archives: children

Twenty Ways To Celebrate Imbolc

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  1. Make a Swedish Snow Lantern. This is a fun way to enjoy the snow, involve kids, and candles. If you live somewhere there is snow, this is a great way to spend the day.
  2. Make a Brigid’s Cross. The Goddess Brigid is always a big part of Imbolc. This cross is usually hung over or near the entry doorway for protection?
  3. Light candles. Candles are used as a form of sympathetic magic to help bring the sun and the warmth back after winter.
  4. Clean your home. A long time ago, our ancestors that lived in colder climates, virtually spent all of their time indoors. As a result, their homes were well-kept during this time.
  5. Declutter your home. Again, one of the themes of this day is about hearth and home. If you have more items than you need, take the time to figure out what you no longer need and donate, sell, or give it to someone who needs it.
  6. Cleanse your home. Every so often, homes have negative energy build up. Now is a great time to cleanse your home of that negativity.
  7. Do guided meditations. A lot of this day is about stillness as well. Search YouTube and find some guided meditations that you like.
  8. Do inner work. Do lit work. Do shadow work. Learn to lucid dream, astral project, or shamanic journeying. The important this is to improve your spirituality by learning something new.
  9. Unplug all electronics for the day. This should be a day of calm self-refllection. Electronics tend to ruin that. Turn off all electronics. If it’s something that you find difficult to do, you may want to make it a habit. Back when I was learning to meditate, I was encouraged to do it during down time like waiting in line at the post office or grocery store. However, that’s the time when most of us pull out our phones now, robbing us of those opportunities.
  10. Light your home by candlelight for the night. I always loved candlelight. It really seems to make things seem special. It gives enough light for interactions with family and friends, but not really enough for solo activities.
  11. Make and eat foods made with milk and dairy products. This is probably the least-celebrated of all of the Sabbats, historically. I think there were only two cultures that celebrated it, back in the day. Those that did, celebrated it because after a long and hard winter, the goats started to lactate again, giving everyone milk and cheese to eat. You don’t have to go out of your way to get goats milk and cheese, but if you do, my favorite is gjetost, a Norwegian goat cheese. But really anything to do with dairy is great. We have a homemade Mac & cheese recipe we like. Ice cream or cheesecake are also fun options. Here is a link to some other cooking options for Imbolc.
  12. Make your own cheese. Making your own cheese is surprisingly easy. The tough part is finding creamline milk that hasn’t been ultra pasteurized. I am lucky that I have a dairy up the road that sells milk like that! Here is a how-to guide on making simple cheese at home.
  13. Read books to improve your spiritual knowledge. There are so many great Pagan books out there. There is also a lot of fluff out there too. In order to find a good book nowadays I usually go off the recommendations of friends or go to an actual bookstore and flip through the book first. You can also try the inter-library loan system. Unfortunately, where I live, they don’t have a lot of Pagan books, even for inter-library loan.
  14. Feed animals who might be struggling through the winter. Those of us whose ancestors lived in cold climates struggled with having enough to eat throughout the winter. Animals still experience that struggle. If you live in a cold climate, consider leaving out some food for them.
  15. Take a walk in the snow (if your locale permits). Even if you live in a warm climate, it’s still a great idea to take a walk in nature and experience what weather is typical for Imbolc in the climate you live in.
  16. Create a corn dolly. This sounds odd because corn is associated with Lughnasadh, but the husks need to be dried first. Apparently Imbolc was a time they were made, possibly in keeping with the need for fertility for planting at Ostara. Here is a tutorial on how to make one.
  17. Create a protective sigil. Home magic is something that is great to do on this day. Here is a guide to making your own sigil.
  18. Do divination. Divination is something else that was commonly practiced historically. Usually questions were asked about the harvest and community, but feel free to ask what you want to know. Don’t have a form of divination? Now s a great time to learn! Tarot, runes, pendulums, palmistry, tea leaves, scrying, the choices are endless!
  19. Tell stories. Now is a great time for storytelling, preferably by candlelight. Pick stories that teach a lesson, teach about your religion, or traditional stories from your people.
  20. Do a ritual. Spend time honoring your personal God’s and beliefs in a ritual.

Creating A Family Yule Tradition

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There are many Pagans who struggle this time of year. It seems like everyone celebrates Christmas, but we celebrate Yule. Whether you’re a new Pagan trying to start new traditions or an experienced Pagan that wants to start including your family in your Sabbat celebrations, this article is for you.

Figure out what you want. Do you want your family to do rituals together? Do you want them to do what you usually do on Christmas, but only on the Solstice instead? Do you want to create new traditions? Which ones? Do a Google search to find some inspiration.

I personally wanted to create a cultural tradition with four presents apiece (something you want, something you need, something to wear, and something to read). We would have a tree, decorate it with ornaments and natural items like popcorn and cranberries. We would bake cookies together and share a family meal. We would sing songs and spend time together as a family.

Get your spouse or partner on board. Talk with your partner about what you want. Ask them what they want. It’s pretty much a guarantee that you won’t agree about something and will have to compromise.

For my family, I didn’t really care if my son had a mythical being that brought him presents, but my husband did. I hated the idea of our son participating in photos with Santa or our neighborhood nativity play, but my husband didn’t want him to feel left out. My husband’s family had a tradition of getting pajamas and a book the night before Christmas so they can wear them and read. He also had a tradition of the kids each getting an ornament each year, so that by the time they are 18, they will have at least 18 ornaments to decorate a tree of their own. They also all sat around while their parent read “The Night Before Christmas”.

In the end, we agreed to add an ornament to the four gifts. They would open two of the gifts the night before Yule so they could read in their pajamas. We would find some mythical being to believe in related to Yule. We will not do Santa and nativity plays. We also agreed to keep stockings a tradition, but haven’t figured out what to do with them, since they only get five presents. We don’t read “The Night Before Christmas”. My husband makes a big meal for us. The kid(s) and I make and decorate cookies, but not necessarily on Yule.

Take the age of your kids into consideration. The age of a child can make a big difference when it comes to changing family traditions. The given ages are only an approximation, so you can do what works best for you and your children.

0-3 years – If you have young kids, it is an ideal time to start new traditions. If they’re really young, they won’t remember what you did last year,so you can start whatever you want without them knowing any differently.

4-7 years – If they’re a bit older, you can just make your changes saying,”We will be doing it this way from now on.”

8-10 years – They will require more explanation and possibly easing them into it. One year you can change the date and keep everything else the same. The following year you can add one tradition you like and subtract one you don’t like. You can also give some examples and ask them what they would like to include.

11-18 years – At this age, they’re more independent. Due to developmental changes, they’re starting to be more interested in their peers than the family unit. Explain to them what you would like to do. Give them some options and ask for feedback. Don’t just listen to what they have to say and do what you want anyway. Actually incorporate at least one of their suggestions, even if it wasn’t what you had in mind. If they want to celebrate Yule by staying up all night with their friends at your house then exchanging presents at dawn, let them. At least they will be on board with celebrating it, even if it’s not quite what you envisioned.

18+ years – Assuming your kids are living outside of the home, it shouldn’t matter too much what you do to celebrate. If they celebrate with you, you can inform them. There might even be pushback because it’s not what they remember fondly from their childhood. If they really have a problem with it, discuss what traditions were the most important to them and continue those traditions. If your children still live at home over the age of 18, follow the protocol for 11-18 year olds.

Take your extended family into consideration. It’s likely that most of us have some family who aren’t Pagan. Figure out what part they will play in your celebrations. Some more open-minded family members might join you for Yule presents or a Yule dinner. Many will still insist on you celebrating Christmas or Hanukkah the same way they do every year. While you can do what you want, unless they’re toxic people, I see no need to alienate family members just because they celebrate a different holiday.

When my son gets old enough to ask, I intend to explain that they celebrate Christmas so we celebrate it with them. Just like we celebrate Yule, so they come celebrate it with us. Whenever something comes up at these other celebrations that I don’t agree with, I will chalk it up to a difference in holidays. “Oh, Santa comes here because they celebrate Christmas,” then explain that we don’t do Santa when the kid is out of earshot. You may have to explain a few times. You may choose to avoid family that refuses to abide by your wishes.

Take the rest of the world into consideration. When you have kids, they don’t live in a vacuum only seeing and hearing what you want them to. They will be exposed to Christmas at the very least. You should be prepared to explain to your kids when they ask about other holidays.

I personally believe mine should be educated so they know what is out there. I plan to tell him that different people celebrate different things and that’s okay.

What does your family do to celebrate Yule? Please let us know in the comments!

Recovery – 33 Days of Abstinence

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I got started with a new sponsor. She seemed to be very thorough and to-the-point (which I like). She gave me a list of eating behaviors and asked which ones I did. She then gave me a bunch of rules that I needed to follow in addition to abstaining from sugar. I don’t remember all of them because many were non-issues for me. The ones I do remember are: don’t eat standing up, eat slowly, do not do anything else while eating (like play on your phone or watch tv), do not take seconds, do not hide your eating, do not eat in the car, and only weigh yourself once a week. I argued for weighing daily and for our movie night once a week where we share a big bowl of popcorn. She was willing to allow movie night, but not weighing more often than once a week. She did not ask that I provide her with my food ahead of time and seemed to trust that I was following the guidelines, which I was. There was one exception, but I figured it wouldn’t count. I wanted a banana for a snack. However, my son loves bananas and would want one if he saw me eat it. We only allow him one banana a day because they make him constipated and he already had one that day. So I ate a banana while standing and hiding so my son wouldn’t put up a fuss (he’s only one and a half).

With this new sponsor, I was flying through the steps. She had me read each step in the book and then discuss the step with her. There seemed to be some pivotal questions to answer and then I was onto the next step. Today I reached step 3: “Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.”  I knew I would have to deal with this eventually. I prayed and meditated for weeks hoping to find a deity willing to take on me and my recovery. Instead, I was met with silence. I finally decided to use “my-best-and-highest-self” or “Goddess-within-me” as my higher power. I’m glad I did, because when I thought about turning my will and life into the care of an outside deity, I think I would have had a more difficult time doing it. Instead, I could definitely turn my will and life over the best version of myself. Gods know, I am certainly not the best version of myself right now, but she is in there somewhere.

I attended my fourth meeting today. I had even convinced my husband to attend (albeit in the back). He has eating issues but is still convinced he can handle them on his own. Even so, he was curious about what happened at these meetings. He was called out at the beginning of the meeting for not being part of it. The woman who did this was the only sponsor in the room (what a great example). She claimed she was concerned about anonymity (even though this was an open meeting) and told him to go sit in another room. I was annoyed but stayed because I am abstinent for 33 days today and was looking forward to getting my coin for 30 days of abstinence.

The meeting continued with their usual announcements at the beginning, including “children are welcome so long as they are supervised”. My 1.5 year old son was there, giggling, running around and smiling at everyone. He was never an issue before. In fact, I was told to bring him back because he was a sweet boy. Now I am not one of those parents who is deluded in thinking that my terror of a son is a sweet boy. My son did not scream or cry. He didn’t even babble much and when he did it wasn’t that loud. They asked if my husband could look after my son. I said he could for today, but that there were days when I would have to bring him. I brought my son to my husband in the other room who suggested we leave. I agreed with him and started crying because I really felt unwelcome. One woman came out and apologized for the others and begged me not to give up OA because of it. I told her I didn’t intend to, but that I wasn’t going to drive an hour to go to that meeting again either. I was livid. There were no other meetings within an hour drive of me (except for the ones that met when I was at work). I never did get my coin.

I received a phone call from one of the members of the meeting about an hour later. Apparently after I left, they were all discussing how they could have handled it better. They decided to add language at the beginning of the meeting to mention that all who were interested in OA were welcome at the meeting. Unfortunately, they also changed the language at the beginning of the meeting from “all children are welcome if they are supervised” to “all children are welcome, but they must be in a different room from the meeting.” There is no way in hell I’m putting my one and a half year old in another room by himself (or with another child). So basically I can only go when I had child care, meaning my husband would stay at home with him when he could. That also meant that he could not come to meetings with me. I am very angry that this happened. I resent them for the way they treated my family today. I also resent them for changing the rules so I could no longer attend regularly. I am told that the next step is all about resentments, so this next step should be fun.

Santa Claus Alternatives for Pagan Kids

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I have mentioned before that I am working on starting family traditions while my son is still young.  He’s 16 months old, so I figured now is the perfect time to figure all of this out.  My husband and I both want to celebrate Yule, but our families both celebrate Christmas.  In no other religion that I know of do you have to create new traditions when you join.  One of the things I love about being an Eclectic Pagan is is that I take whatever works from whatever religion I like.  I like it because there are so many good things in so many religions worth “stealing”.  However, when it comes to figuring out how to celebrate holidays, it makes things tough.

My husband and I had the “Santa Claus” talk.  I was in favor of telling not telling our son about Santa, he wasn’t.  His argument had nothing to do with “the truth” or getting to participate in the “magic” of it and everything to do with how our son wouldn’t know about Santa when he entered school.  Because of this, I started researching some options for our family. Here are some options of Santa Claus alternatives for Pagan kids.

 A depiction of the Holly King

The Holly King – In Celtic traditions, there is a story of the Oak King and the Holly King. The Holly King rules the cold part of the year with the height of his power being at Yule. At the equinoxes, the power switches hands. The Holly King also looks quite a bit like Santa Claus.

Mother Berchta –  She rides her goat with a sack on her back full of foods.  She goes to houses, roasts the goat and gives the food.  The bones go back in the bag and out jumps the goat good as new!  One time a child purposely broke one of the goat’s bones and she put the child in the bag and took then away.  So now she brings gifts to good kids and takes the bad ones.  

Odin – Odin had a lot of characteristics of what we think of as Santa Claus now. His name in Old Norse even has the first syllable of “Jul” ( pronounced Yule in English).

Odin on Sleipnir

The Yule Lads –  It’s a Scandinavian tradition (in Scandinavia, they still call Christmas, Jul) where the kids leave their shoe on the windowsill for the last 13 nights before Yule.  If they were good, they get a treat. If not, they get a rotten potato. 

A depiction of some of the Yule Lads on a Scandinavian milk carton

This is also a great article about some lesser-known festive traditions!

What does your family do? Tell us in the comments below!