When you are a baby, fat is good. People look at the rolls and comment on how cute the “chunky thighs”. A chubby toddler is cute too because they are still growing out of their baby fat. Once a child gets school age, the negative comments tend to roll in, especially if the chubby child is a female. Working in schools, I have heard adults refer to chubby girls just starting school as a “little meatball” or “little chunker”. That’s where it starts. As young as kindergarten. I remember inviting the “fat girl” to my birthday party as a child. I didn’t actually know her all that well, but knew her as the fat girl. As we got older, she got bigger and bigger. She smelled bad, so nobody wanted to be around her. People made fun of her. I didn’t understand why, but saw that apparently fat was something you made fun of.
As you grow up, especially as a woman, you are constantly told by advertisements and media that you are not good enough. Your face isn’t shaped right, so you should fix it with makeup. You have pimples or blackheads, so you should use special products to make them go away. Buy hair products so your hair can be right. Your body isn’t shaped right, so you must eat a specific diet or work out so you can fit the right mold. Buy body shapers. Buy clothes to flatter your figure. Buy. Buy. Buy.
What nobody every told me was that these images were unattainable. These photographs were altered or they were taken of someone who was a winner of the genetic lottery. No amount of make-up, cleansers, dieting, or exercising is going to get you to look like these people in advertisements. There are several billion-dollar industries telling you how you should look.
Opposing that is the multi-billion dollar industry selling you food that will undo all of that. They do research into how much it takes you to be satiated and make their bags slightly smaller so you have to buy two. They do research into what tastes good and bombard your taste buds with those flavors. They add fillers and preservatives so it will have a longer shelf life. And none of it is good for your body. They won’t tell you that. Those chips are gluten free. Those cookies are low-fat. They will find some way to spin everything. And to top it all off, this food is somehow cheaper than buying fruits and vegetables that have had no modifications done to it! This is how our nation has become plus-sized. They offer cheaper, convenient food that tastes good that you can fit into your busy schedule.
The average woman in the U.S.A. is between a size 16 and 18. Anyone who has shopped in these sizes should know that these sizes vary widely. According to Wikipedia, the average size 18 is bust: 43 “, waist: 34″, and hips: 44.5”. With all my weight-loss, I bought a pair of sized 18 jeans last week, even though my measurements were larger than that. It was the first time in years I was able to buy jeans from the “regular” section. That’s good because the same pair of jeans from the same brand that was a size 20 was $50. The pair I bought were $24.50.
In addition to it still being okay to make fun of fat people, those who are overweight are being screwed over in other ways as well. As I mentioned earlier, clothes cost disproportionately more when you are in plus sizes. There are less brand names that carry your sizes, so you have less to choose from and it’s less likely you will look good in what you buy. Larger butts don’t fit in regular sized seats. When I was pregnant, I had to stop going to certain movie theaters because my hips swelled up too wide and I couldn’t fit in the seats. Airlines charge extra for larger seats for larger passengers. If someone in a wheelchair needed to fly, do you think they would be charged extra!? No. But it’s still okay to discriminate against fat people.
Nobody actually calls it discrimination, but that’s what it is. Before I got pregnant, I was the picture of health — on paper, except for my weight. But I had rolls and stretch marks, so I couldn’t actually be healthy. My doctors couldn’t figure out how I could be large and still healthy. That’s where this discrimination comes from, the idea that it’s okay to discriminate against people, because we did this to ourselves. We made ourselves fat by eating too much or the wrong things or not exercising. When, in reality, these companies are marketing all of these foods that not only make you fat, but are addictive. And they get away with it because everyone can still discriminate against fat people. They claim they are worried for their health. If they were really concerned about our health, there would be body-positive ads on tv. There would be as many commercials about vegetables as for junk food. Food lobbyists wouldn’t be allowed to influence the national food pyramid (or whatever it is they’re calling it this year).
And then social media tells me to love my body. Even though it’s 39 years old, has several surgery scars, a large pooch from where my son lived for 10 months, some whiteheads on my cheeks, some stretchmarks on my belly, too much hair on some areas, mis-matched boobs, hair that won’t do what I want it to, joints that tell me that I am either too heavy or getting old, muscles that won’t do what I want them to anymore, fat rolls, and not enough energy to get me through the day. I am supposed to suddenly love all of that? After being told my whole life that I am not good enough, that I must pay extra because I’m fat, that I will never live up to the ideal beauty, that because of my sex I am often defined and judged by my looks, but I am supposed to forget all of the conditioning and just suddenly love myself!? I have seen through that false advertising long ago, but it’s still a whole lot to swallow. I would love to love my body, but I’m just not sure I can.
